Saturday

Well today had both good points and some not so good. I shared with Beth how I do not want to be negative in my update. Yesterday at my physical therapy visit the head therapist said she sent a discharge date to my doctors for the end of October. Looking at how many more visits that is I am half way through my rehabilitation. My concern is I have less use of my leg than I did before the surgery by far. My thought is if I am half way through and I have only about 25% usage and looking at being released from rehabilitation means I will not re-gain the 80 to 100% use back. Of course there is a piece of me that says "they are giving up" and I am not. I think about my Trans AM and if I cannot move my left foot up, down or to either side then I cannot drive her again. I mentioned this to my therapist and she a few times during our talk pointed out that during surgery there could be damage done to the brain that cannot be undone. So basically accept where I am at, but I am having a real hard time because that means I will not be able to interact with little Molly or other future grand children. :( I keep thinking back to Kate saying a new normal and I am discovering that even yet. Today I trimmed my last eight bushes which felt good to accomplish it but was tiring. I am still exercising my leg and I am trying to get a mind set that is one of "they are under estimating me and my God". If it is His will that I do not gain any more use then I will accept that, but only if that is His will. I will continue to believe that usage of my leg will come back to 80 percent or more. So I hope this report does not seem down as my intent is to look up and forward to living and enjoying life.